Lost in a Fog

That’s how I feel at the moment. I know that it’s temporary (touch wood, fingers crossed, etc) but I can’t seem to find the motivation to go even one day with eating according to my intended lifestyle or to lift my butt off this chair and do a few push ups. Now, having said that, I have walked over 13,000 steps according to my Polar Loop. Not bad hey? But it was only because I took my students to Winter Wonderland in Hyde Park today and there was a lot of leisurely walking. I didn’t exactly work up a sweat.

I haven’t been to the gym since I started working back in July. That’s a long time! I don’t know when to go. Before I started working, I would go during the day when I dropped Baby Girl off at the childminder or I’d go first thing in the morning when the gym opened at 6am. Now I wake up at 5h45am to get ready for work and then after work I fetch Baby Girl and then spend the rest of the afternoon and evening with her. Evenings are also the only time I get to see the Special One and what if Baby Girl wakes up and wants me and I’m out at the gym?

ARGH!!! I don’t know what to do. Yes, I know that I could workout at home until it becomes more practical to go to the gym. I was doing this barbell complex which is great, but it only lasts 15 minutes and I want something extra. On my wishlist is Shaun T’s Focus25 – now that looks like something I can really get into. Bloody expensive though but I suppose in the long term if I kept at it then it would be worth it. You wouldn’t think that fitness is a priority from reading this, would you? Sorry, this is a bit of a moany post.

Ok, so about nutrition. I’ve adopted a LCHF/banting/keto way of eating. High fat and low carb. Then why the hell did I have a hot chocolate with cream and marshmallows and a flake today? Huh? Why???? It’s like every day there’s something. Almost like I’m rewarding myself, like I’m a dog. WTF? I prepare all these healthy main meals and then mess it up with eating crap. Sugar and shait.

I’m going to try a few new things to help with my motivation and I’ll let you know how that all works out. In the meantime I also need to figure out what I’m afraid of. It’s always a fear that holds us back. I need to get to the bottom of mine.

Apologies for the rant and thanks for reading x


2 thoughts on “Lost in a Fog

  1. please don’t be hard on yourself.
    what is more harmful to self? a hot chocolate or beating yourself up for having one?
    Happy Christmas!!!!


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